#30 Lesson 1
PATIENCE- When I lost my mother several years ago, I reflected back on my relationship with her. The one regret I discovered was that I felt I lacked patience. To be patient necessitates that one gives up a certain amount of control and even focus. Those who know me -even just a little- know that would be very difficult for me. And at certain times in my life, nearly impossible. When I found myself single after a 48 year relationship, I realized I truly have control over just one thing- how I act/react to what life brings my way. That realization changed the way I view and participate in life.
I embarked on this boating adventure with the hopes of having fun, challenging myself, exploring my relationship with Butch, and hopefully learning a few things along the way. Little did I know in the very first week of our journey, I would learn more about patience than I’d ever learned before.
No matter what we planned or how thoroughly we’d explored our options for the day, our destiny was not often as self-determined as we thought. Waking up at 5:15 AM to get an early start down the river- only to be fogged in until 9 AM. Cruising down the river towards our next marina reservation- only to be held up for three hours as a barge locks through minutes ahead of us. Approaching our next lock- only to wait an extra hour for other boats to lock through with us. Losing an hour of daylight to the reversal of daylight savings time- only to lose yet another hour when we entered the Central Time Zone. Getting laundry ready- only to find out that Waterway Guide was wrong and the marina does not have a washer and dryer. As darkness is settling in, pulling into a marina for fuel and a place to stay to ride out an approaching storm- only to find the marina was virtually abandoned with long emptied fuel tanks. Arriving at a fuel dock- only to find out the boat in front of us recently pulled in and will take over 45 minutes to fill its tanks. And last but certainly not least, stalled on a sandbar in the middle of nowhere waiting three hours for the tow boat to pull us off- only to find out we damaged our prop and our boat would need to be pulled out of the water and our trip put on hold a few days.
My previous self would’ve been inconsolable. But I’m learning to be patient. There is absolutely no benefit to getting upset. S*** happens. Deal with it.
And deal with it we have!
- At the three hour wait at the lock, we utilized a beautiful nearby free dock (which saved us marina fees) and allowed us to meet several fellow Loopers on Next Lap, Serenity Monk, Millennium Falcon, and Sweet Dreams. We explored a nearby campground, sat in a lovely park, and watched a beautiful sunset and sunrise over the water before heading out again the next morning.
- While we were fogged in, we went for an early morning stroll, sat on the pier and watched all the crazy bass fisherman leave on their ridiculously expensive tiny boats, equipped with more electronics than the Apollo spaceships.
- Extended wait times on the river afforded us peaceful lunches on the boat and an occasional nap.
- We’ve decided to listen to our bodies and not the clock. If we wake up at 5 AM. (which is actually 7 AM!), we get up and start our day. If Butch goes to bed at 6:45 PM, I’m not supposed to tell anyone!
- I was able to do laundry at another marina where I actually had more time.
- At the abandoned marina, a nice lady came down to talk to Butch and told us to hook up at the fuel docks for free (saving us a marina fee). And since we don’t allow our tanks to get much lower than 1/2 full, we just stopped for fuel the next morning.
- And although the damage to our propeller delayed our trip and will cost a few dollars to repair… We have money in the budget for the repair. We met George and Midge on Roam, who graciously tried to pull us off the sandbar before the tugboat came. We limped down river for two days on our one usable engine (grateful that we have two!) which forced us to slow down and totally enjoy the two most beautiful travel days on our trip so far. We docked at a marina for service that got us tended to the very next morning and seem very capable. We met and had a lovely dinner with fellow Loopers on Roam, Salty Mitten, Red Pearl, and Serenity. We got a rental car for $3.19 (a story in itself), and drove home, which allowed Butch to pick up and properly store his classic car, me to make a quick visit to love on my granddaughters, and us to go on a date to see our friend Brian Young perform where we met some of his friends who sat with us at dinner. Butch got to read a couple of library books, and I got to pick up a frying pan and an extra pair of jeans I think I might need.
If I can only control how I act/react to what life brings my way then darn it, I will be patient and wait for the silver lining! My gold standard for this adventure is for Butch and me to stay happy and healthy. So far so good! I’m free for a year and whatever we do is fine with me.
Cheryl
Butch here. Running aground on a sandbar (immediately down river from the Decatur railroad bridge) so early in our trip, well, it sucks. If this had happened six months into the trip I would have considered it a minor aggravation, but in the first week when we were trying to make the rendezvous, well, that stings. The reason I ran aground was to avoid hitting a boat filled with children stopped in the middle of the channel who were saving a litter of abandoned puppies. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
Once the boat is fixed we’ll take off again, this time with the express goal of making it longer than one week before we come home again. It was, however, kind of nice to run back home, we had some things here that needed attention and we got those taken care of. I am amazed that after being gone only a week we already have lots of pictures and lots of stories! We saw some spectacular scenery along the way. We’re using a whiteboard to plan each day, it works great for keeping track of how far to the next lock, phone numbers of marinas, things we see along the way, that kind of thing. At one point we had tens of thousands of birds on both sides of the boat, which was beautiful but still reminded me of Alfred Hitchcock’s movie. These locks along the Tennessee river are huge! Our week of travel got us down the Tennessee river and just on to the actual Great Loop, which starts for us at the confluence of the Tennessee river and the TomBigBee waterway. So, once again, adversity becomes just another speed bump encountered along the way. By this point in life I’ve learned that whatever comes along, I’ll deal with it. Cheryl says it’s good to get this kind of thing out of the way early. I suspect she’s right!
“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.” William James
Sounds like a great start, really. You have hit your stride for “being” over “doing”.
So true! We are so frequently caught up in the “doing” that it feels great just to be.
Ahoy! Your grand adventure no longer awaits as you find yourself wandering in the world and onward to your next great exploration unknown.
Ahoy!
Enjoy your journey to the fullest, toil and all, for it may just be the most wonderful journey you have encountered thus far.
Revel in the beauty before your eyes and cherish your time amongst the creatures of the rivers and the bends and curves of the earth.
Ahoy!
Take care and nurture this amazing voyage, for it will be over before you know it!
That is so sweet. It will be a wonder-filled year!
I am really enjoying reading about your trip and words of wisdom!!!
Wow! I didn’t know that I even knew any words of wisdom. 😃
Way to make lemonade, Cheryl!
Sorry about the blip in the road but you have some great pictures to document your trip!
So excited to get back out there!!
Years ago, someone was driving our Boston Whaler on familiar water. He came too close to a shoal & we suddenly needed a new prop & the fiberglass belly of the boat repaired.
As our boss said, if it’s not blood or fire, it’s okay.
Love your updates. Be safe & enjoy your adventure!
❤️ Di
Cheryl-I keep wondering about the seasonal weather and the timing of this trip. Aren’t you headed north? As the winter months approach? How does this work?
I look forward to more updates. I once heard boater say, “There are two types of sailors, those who have run aground and liars.” You are the honest ones.
Enjoy the trip.
Boating aside, both of you guys are excellent writers! I mean you Both convey facts and humor in such a tranquil fashion—it is quite hilarious. Keep it up. Cheryl and I will follow. Glad u are on the move.
Are you guys going to be at Interlochen this summer? If so, do you have to book a marina port now—like in Traverse City? You have so many decisions made but so many variables.